In searching for some other documents, I stumbled upon this statement, which I had to prepare prior to acceptance into PhD programme. Though somewhat personal, I thought I should put it here...It gives an insight into some aspects of who I am...and it raises even more questions for those who do not know me....

...The weight of the train pressed the tracks against the frozen ground. The sparks flew around and through the train wheels, dancing in the dark night, falling onto the white snow and dying out there. The tracks seemed to groan underneath the load of the cold January. That night, the train’s cargo was bursting with tears, and sad, lifeless and hopeless faces mingled among us. I observed my mother. Her body swayed back and forth, following the beat of the train wheels, but her face distinguished itself from everyone else’s. Deep concentration was chiseled in the lines of her face and energy shone in her eyes as she tried to prepare a few pieces of bread for us to eat. The spreading of the margarine on the thin slices of bread consumed her; her eyes were fixed on what she was doing. As I observed her in her work, all the sounds, except the groaning of the train disappeared into the whiteness of the night. I moved my body to a seat close to the window and gently blew hot air on it to steam it up. Hastily I wrote my name on it, and looked out onto the scene stretching for miles. The lights from other compartments reflected onto the frozen earth, producing, due to train’s speed, a never-ending line of shadows. How many were sitting in the same boat as us, I wondered. How many were abandoning home and family and possessions, to chase a hope, a dream of freedom? The train groaned once more. I moved away from the window and reached for the bread my mom offered me. I ate silently, gazing at my mom’s enthusiastic eyes, my dad’s protective posture and my brother’s fearful face. My brother finished his bread in silence. After finishing our dinner, we leaned against each other’s bodies and allowed the train to sway us to sleep…
It has been estimated by UNICEF that over 25 million people are forced to abandon their homes, leave their belongings, and seek a hiding place or refuge due to conflicts and war in today’s world. Over 20 million of those people are children[1]. That cold winter night in 1992, my brother and I contributed to that number. And since that night, today’s children also share our fate.

Millions of children find themselves in conflicts in which “they are not only bystanders, but often the prime targets.”[2] They are seriously injured, maimed and permanently disabled. They die because of poor hygiene, disease, and malnutrition, or are exploited as soldiers. Specifically, they are often under attack by combatants or abducted and used as sexual slaves. States faced with the violations of human rights often claim that such involvement of children in armed conflict “is regrettable but inevitable”; however, Graca Machel claims in her report that it is not. She argues that children are involved in warfare as a result of conscious and deliberate decisions made by adults, and that these decisions must be challenged, in order to refute the flawed political and military reasoning.[3] The Impact of Armed Conflict on Children report-better known as The Machel Report-presented to the United Nations General Assembly at its 51st Session in New York City on 26 August 1996, called for all Member States to realize that the systematic abuse and violation of children’s rights during an armed conflict is “an area in which everyone shares responsibility and a degree of blame.” [4] I concur with Ms. Machel. We do carry responsibility, as this world is interconnected and one political, social or economic variable influences another. But wanting to assume the responsibility without appropriate tools to tackle the challenge will ultimately lead to apathy, hopelessness and despair.

Conflict destroys the infrastructure, the economy and the stability of a country. The first two can be rebuilt and stability achieved, but only if the future generation of the country is still intact. Who will rebuild the country, if not the young and dynamic hands and minds? If children are maimed, molested, abused, psychologically and emotionally scarred, and killed, the downfall of any state is inevitable! I am only one person, but an ocean is made out of individual drops of water. I know that my drop can contribute to a ripple effect. That cold night in January, I thought the worst was behind us. But the nightmare was yet to come, and my brother and I have felt the brunt and the weight of it for years. I promised myself after those years of struggle and immense pain that I would do all in my power to ensure that today’s children will have a safer childhood. It is a path and responsibility worthy of struggle and I want to assume it...

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[1] Kastberg, Nils. 2002. Strengthening the response to displaced children.
<http://www.fmreview.org/FMRpdfs/FMR15/fmr15.1.pdf>. 12. January 2005.
[2] Machel, Graca. Impact of Armed Conflict on Children. United Nations Resolution A/51/306. Read by Secretary-General Kofi Annan at the 51st session in New York City on 26. August 1996 (Paragraph 1).
[3] Ibid., Paragraphs 316 and 317.
[4] Ibid., Paragraphs 316 and 317.